-Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are known today as giraffes.
-When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
-Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience.
-Chuck Norris is the only man known to punch a Cyclops between the eyes.
-Chuck Norris kicked planet Earth, and it hasn't stopped spinning to the day.
-Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because the only element Chuck Norris recognises, is the element of surprise.
-There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed, because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
-Chuck Norris can leave a message before the beep.
-Chuck Norris bit the Apple logo.
-Everybody tries to be perfect...Perfection tries to be Chuck Norris.
-Chuck Norris doesn't need a GPS. Chuck Norris decides where he is.
-Unstoppable force meeting immovable object? Chuck Norris clapping hands.
-Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.
-Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
-Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
-Chuck Norris died 20 years ago. Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
-Some magicians can walk on water. Chuck Norris can swim through land.
-Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
